102 - 1563 - 1 month ago

Is it fair for your partner to give his loyality to his sister over his lover?

Kelly - 52yo - level 13

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3 weeks ago

I'm of the opinion that when the relationship with your partner is serious and long term, you both become each other's top priorities. At that point, family only becomes prioritized in a crisis. Boundaries are healthy and important.

Regina - 23yo - level 11 -
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3 weeks ago

I believe that when a man or woman is married that their spouse is or should be the top priority. Siblings can still be supported and loved; they should just not come before a spouse in my thought process.

Jesse - level 8 -
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3 weeks ago

Are you married? If so no! Is this a long time relationship? Again No! Is it someone you just met? Then yes!

Billy - 60yo - level 25 -
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3 weeks ago

I'm not sure it's fair to ask someone for unconditional loyalty at all. Not knowing the situation makes this difficult to answer, but if a person feels he has to side with one person he cares about against another person he cares about, he should feel able to decide which thing to side with based on his own beliefs or opinions. A loving relationship should allow and respect that choice, wherever the chips fall.

Rebekkah - 41yo - level 33 -
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3 weeks ago

That was a great answer!

Lorraine - 28yo - level 36 -
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3 weeks ago

Family is important but there also needs be boundaries in how involved the sister is in YOUR relationship.

Rosio - 32yo - level 13 -
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3 weeks ago

👏🏼

Charlene - 39yo - level 14 -
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3 weeks ago

This can be based on the length of the relationship but if they have be dating for a while I think your loyalty should reside with your lover

Ron - 36yo - level 8 -
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3 weeks ago

N0

Rashad - 31yo - level 10 -
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3 weeks ago

No not ok 1 bit

Jamie - 33yo - level 4 -
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3 weeks ago

No you stand by your partner rightir wrong.

Luke - 27yo - level 15 -
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3 weeks ago

Absolutely not

Derrick - 33yo - level 12 -
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3 weeks ago

No

Daliso - 30yo - level 13 -
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3 weeks ago

Nope

Chelsie - 29yo - level 11 -
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3 weeks ago

Aw hell naw

Jalisa - 18yo - level 15 -
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3 weeks ago

Depending on the situation, he shouldn't blow off his lover for his sister but he shouldn't do the same to his sister maybe invite the lover along.

Tiffany - 27yo - level 9 -
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3 weeks ago

It's wrong on all levels to place any family member over your spouse.

Nicholus Baker - 33yo - level 16 -
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3 weeks ago

No

Kei - 30yo - level 9 -
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3 weeks ago

Not fair. Loyalty to both equally.

Jim - 42yo - level 11 -
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3 weeks ago

Nup

Ankita - 28yo - level 17 -
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3 weeks ago

No. Absolutely not.

Anna - 19yo - level 17 -
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3 weeks ago

It’s called partners for a reason. Your significant other should be your number one loyalty. Priorities and boundaries are part of every healthy relationship.

Melissa - 37yo - level 14 -
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3 weeks ago

Not always. First of all Rights right and wrongs wrong, second you may have grown up with your sister but that doesn't mean that she gets to trump your lovers opinion. Loyalty comes with trust to an extent, and if you allow your sister to "win" all the time, your lover will feel that she has something over her. Which leads to disrespect and rivals.

Kate - 25yo - level 18 -
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3 weeks ago

Not at all. The bible says to leave your mother and father and become one with your bride, I don't recall a clause that said "unless your sister needs you". My husband would fully support my answer. #AskMeHowIKnow 🙄

Charlene - 39yo - level 14 -
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3 weeks ago

If you're married nope

Ed - 28yo - level 16 -
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3 weeks ago

Depends on the situation, character, priority and his decision.. I don't own him after all, we are sharing our lives together

Randa - 27yo - level 2 -
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3 weeks ago

Depends

Mandi - 38yo - level 6 -
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3 weeks ago

It really depends on the circumstances

Brandy - 46yo - level 4 -
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3 weeks ago

It takes balance. You can't rightly abandon either.

Andrew Wright - 23yo - level 12 -
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3 weeks ago

It depends

Justin - level 10 -
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3 weeks ago

Uhhh... YES!?!?
Like come on... My love isn't aloud to get pissed about that or if I have to cancel plans with her cuz of my mother as well!

Matt - 24yo - level 15 -
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3 weeks ago

No

Travis - 31yo - level 6 -
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2 weeks ago

Yes family first, as long as you still show your spouse the same loyalty and respect then it's alright.

Ashley - 33yo - level 1 -
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2 weeks ago

No.

Tracy - 32yo - level 1 -
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2 weeks ago

No, unless she is right amd the lover has been proven wrong. You must have 100% facts though. Other then that you should always side with your lover and always protect them!

Amanda - 47yo - level 4 -
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2 weeks ago

These two things shouldn't have to be at odds. But if they are, unless the decision means you're being treated poorly let family work family stuff out. My sister and my wife have been pretty close, and pretty distant. But as long as I'm not hurting my wife she'll support me being there for my sister when needed

Mike - 34yo - level 7 -
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2 weeks ago

Depends on the situation. Usually, the wife should come first, but sister should come before girlfriend. It really depends on what 'loyalty' means

Rachel - 20yo - level 18 -
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2 weeks ago

🤷🏾‍♀️

Melissa - 39yo - level 1 -
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2 weeks ago

Yes

Tanesha - 37yo - level 10 -
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2 weeks ago

No , your partner needs your loyalty because you guys might end up together forever

Festaucia - 19yo - level 2 -
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2 weeks ago

Depends how far along the relationship is. Engaged would be the point wheee I'd say no.

Rhett - 46yo - level 17 -
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2 weeks ago

Blood over boobs

Haley - 20yo - level 1 -
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3 weeks ago

No.. period. Spouse is most important

Tony Koen - 49yo - level 7 -
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3 weeks ago

I think at first a partners loyalties naturally lie with their families because they have known them longer. But as a relationship grows and becomes more committed than their loyalties should begin to shift as they are developing their own families at that point. If their loyalties still lie with their own families than that should be an indicator of their lack of trust in their partners and/or their intentions for the future...

Debbie - 37yo - level 7 -
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3 weeks ago

Blood is always thicker than water. If you are with someone long term and the choice hurts you then no it's not ok.

Kathleen - 26yo - level 10 -
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3 weeks ago

Depends on how close you are

Raigan - 39yo - level 8 -
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3 weeks ago

It's relative but mostly no

Mapani - 20yo - level 7 -
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3 weeks ago

Absolutely not, if they are married, if they are just dating then that’s a different story.

LeBaron Cooley - 40yo - level 14 -
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3 weeks ago

Spouse is first priority. Siblings, and other family members come after.

Troy - 47yo - level 5 -
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3 weeks ago

Not if you’re married... however family and spouses aren’t going anywhere so great effort should be given by all to come to good terms

Serina - 28yo - level 9 -
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3 weeks ago

Sometimes yes, but not all the time.

Brittiney - 33yo - level 1 -
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3 weeks ago

No

Michelle - 42yo - level 4 -
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3 weeks ago

I can understand at some point. Family is important, if he closes to her, it’s understandable.

Romuald - 26yo - level 22 -
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3 weeks ago

No

Terri - level 1 -
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3 weeks ago

Only if you are the sister 😂

Lola - 29yo - level 17 -
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3 weeks ago

Blood comes first your partner is family their is a difference

Ash - level 5 -
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3 weeks ago

He doesn't have one.

Tiana - 18yo - level 8 -
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3 weeks ago

Family is important but I feel like there has to be boundaries when it comes to their involvement in your romantic relationship.

Nadine Morales - 32yo - level 14 -
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3 weeks ago

No. You should put your partner first above everyone except God

Kristin - 33yo - level 4 -
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3 weeks ago

'm of the opinion that when the relationship with your partner is serious and long term, you both become each other's top priorities. At that point, family only becomes prioritized in a crisis. Boundaries are healthy and important.

Tia - level 11 -
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3 weeks ago

No

Tia - level 11 -
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3 weeks ago

Situation dependant, it isn’t about who you are loyal to, it’s about who you agree with and who is in the right or wrong, be true to yourself and regret nothing

Adam - 25yo - level 13 -
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3 weeks ago

No

Alex - 30yo - level 3 -
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3 weeks ago

It would have to depend on the situation. In a healthy relationship I would hope that you would support each others loyalties to the important people in their lives.

Jamie - 38yo - level 12 -
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3 weeks ago

Yes but only to a certain degree, there should be boundaries and he should never choose the sister over you more than 50% of the time

Cindy - 22yo - level 11 -
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3 weeks ago

If you are in a serious relationship and really love your partner they should be you first priority

Melani - 24yo - level 8 -
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3 weeks ago

No your partner is first

Richard - 55yo - level 28 -
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3 weeks ago

Yes

Angie - 24yo - level 14 -
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3 weeks ago

It depends how long they have been together. Ideally it would be equal

Claire - 18yo - level 9 -
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3 weeks ago

Lover yes, spouse no

Raylene - 52yo - level 13 -
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3 weeks ago

Absolutely not. It is however a common problem. Loyalties often get confused when family of origin is involved. Does that make it right or acceptable, no. You should have that same protective nature over your partner as you do your family, and honestly, it should take precedence.

Jenny - 31yo - level 27 -
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3 weeks ago

I’m tired of the “family is everything” motto. I forget who said it and what the exact quote is, but it’s something along the lines of “bonds made of blood are thicker than those made of the waters of the womb” which is to say that those we choose to spend our time with are ultimately closer to us than those who we had no choice with. I am of the opinion that at some point your significant other is very much more important than your nuclear family.

Nate - 19yo - level 12 -
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3 weeks ago

It is both sides of the family can get together so my partner and I spaned time with his side and my side of the family we are closed to our family.

Jeda - 34yo - level 10 -
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3 weeks ago

It is both sides of the family can get together so my partner and I spaned time with his side and my side of the family we are closed to our family

Jeda - 34yo - level 10 -
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3 weeks ago

I believe spouses should be a priority

Laura - 29yo - level 8 -
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3 weeks ago

It depends in part in context, but in general, if the relationship is serious, no.

Monica - 23yo - level 1 -
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3 weeks ago

It depends in part on context, but generally, if the relationship is serious, no.

Monica - 23yo - level 1 -
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3 weeks ago

Idk how to even feel I mean yes the lover should take priority but my bf calls his sister babe and baby, slaps her butt and vise versa, she walks around in her underwear 24/7 w her ass hanging out, and I "can't say anything about it" or my bf says he'll break up w me, and she's 16 and he's 32

Kaile - 18yo - level 15 -
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3 weeks ago

No

Calcuttah - 35yo - level 10 -
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3 weeks ago

If married, definitely not. But it is also important to help him with hurtful family history issues if those contribute to that loyalty. Getting mad and reacting never helps. Talking through things and allowing him to understand our hurt helps us wives to get our point across without getting over emotional.

Sarah - 28yo - level 6 -
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3 weeks ago

If they are only Lovers and not married, yes.

Duane - level 18 -
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3 weeks ago

No it is not

Dlip - 32yo - level 11 -
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3 weeks ago

Depends on the importance of the issue. If minor then why not, as long as it is the correct side

Marcos - 27yo - level 13 -
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3 weeks ago

Not at all

Robert - 37yo - level 12 -
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3 weeks ago

For me, marriage changes the relationship. My wife is number one, over parents, siblings and even our kids. We've been married 22 years now with two kids and this has been tested many times. It's not easy, but it's worth standing your ground on!

Tim - 41yo - level 12 -
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3 weeks ago

Depends on what the trade off is. If sister is cast overboard and will drown, but lover is safe on the boat, it'd be stupid not to act. All else equal, though, family should come first. If two people are married, then they are the closest kind of family.

Russ - 39yo - level 20 -
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3 weeks ago

No

Paula - 46yo - level 19 -
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3 weeks ago

Yes, family first.

Blake - 30yo - level 11 -
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3 weeks ago

???

Isn't your partner meant to be your closest family member? Especially if you're married? Your response makes no sense to me whatsoever.

Jacob - 17yo - level 18 -
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3 weeks ago

No

Moe - 20yo - level 8 -
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3 weeks ago

Definitely, unless his sister is clearly wrong

Edd - 22yo - level 14 -
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3 weeks ago

Nope that is a trick question anyway it all depends on the situation

Andrew - level 15 -
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3 weeks ago

It should depend on the situation at hard

Leah - 40yo - level 12 -
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3 weeks ago

Depends on the situation but usually yeah. If the sister is being genuinely nasty then maybe not but in normal situations then yeah

Ben - 18yo - level 7 -
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3 weeks ago

It depends

Cristina - 18yo - level 12 -
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3 weeks ago

Depends on the situation Boone should have to choose family over lovers. Need to have a happy medium never make someone choose you over family. What would you do if you had to choose ?

Nikki - 41yo - in a relationship for 10 years - Living together - 1 - Coon rapids,Mn, United States - level 19 -
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3 weeks ago

Yes.

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3 weeks ago

No

Jodie - 29yo - level 11 -
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3 weeks ago

Why can't he be loyal to both?

Brittany - 32yo - level 2 -
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3 weeks ago

No

Luiza - 30yo - level 8 -
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3 weeks ago

No

Jill - 48yo - level 16 -
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3 weeks ago

If your in a relationship...your loyalty should be with your partner. So no it's not fair for him not to be loyal to you.

Mariam - 27yo - level 8 -
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3 weeks ago

Depending on how long you have been in the relationship with your significant other.

Rick - 44yo - level 39 -
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3 weeks ago

Depends on the situation, a level respect needs to be given to both parties and these situations should arise.

Dan - 36yo - level 6 -
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3 weeks ago

Yes it's fair.

Shivam - 30yo - level 11 -
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