70 - 732 - 7 months ago

Is there a way to move past infidelity (if your partner genuinely is sorry and wants to fix the relationship)?

Davida - 38yo - level 43

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7 months ago

Definitely. Infidelity isn't necessarily a sign that your partner is a bad person, and it's not something that can't be fixed. If they are genuinely sorry it means something in the relationship structurally hasn't been working for them, but that they do still love you. That doesn't mean it's your fault, it just means they didn't communicate a need properly. Have a lot of honest and open communication to see what needs to be different and if you can be okay with what they need to change.

Sam - 18yo - level 43 -
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7 months ago

Well said..

Troy - 35yo - level 12 -
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7 months ago

If something wasn’t working, they should have communicated that before cheating on you. I don’t subscribe to ‘once a cheater, always a cheater’, but I also don’t believe someone willing to cheat on you cares about you as much as you deserve.

They put their own wants/desires before the partnership instead of talking it out. They lied, went behind OPs back, and are now begging forgiveness. They should have thought about that before decieving their partner.

Kailey - 22yo - level 43 -
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7 months ago

💯💯

Charri - 45yo - level 19 -
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7 months ago

👏🏽

Tara - 35yo - level 34 -
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2 weeks ago

😎😎😎😎okkkkuuurrrr!!!

Ashley - 33yo - level 7 -
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7 months ago

I don’t believe so. Cheating is undoubtedly a pondered decision that your partner thought was the best idea at the time. If they thought it to be the best idea to disregard you in their own conscious decision, what does that mean for the relationship between y’all? Forgiveness is an under appreciated quality, but infedelity is a cardinal sin in a relationship.

Colby - 20yo - level 13 -
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7 months ago

No. Trust would be gone and without it there's no relationship.

Meghann - 25yo - level 44 -
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7 months ago

It is possible but it can take a lot of time. The guilty will have to fully open up and do everything to prove that you are the only one. Everyone makes mistakes and everyone deserves the opportunity to correct their mistake. I can talk about it because I have experienced it myself. It takes an average of 2 to 3 years before the trust is completely back. A lot of strength and if you believe in it, go for it!

Philippe - 48yo - level 35 -
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7 months ago

No never,,if something is wrong in the relationship u need to talk about it instead of jumping in bed with someone else,,Once a cheater always a cheater

Denise - 46yo - level 29 -
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7 months ago

Absolutely yes, with the help of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Steve John - 32yo - level 18 -
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7 months ago

Don’t catholosism and christianity demonize infidelity.

Kailey - 22yo - level 43 -
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7 months ago

Kailey, it has nothing to do with Catholicism... forgive and you will be forgiven. Try it tastes amazing..Stay blessed.

Steve John - 32yo - level 18 -
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7 months ago

It will be hard, but you can move past it eventually... maybe counseling would be good in this situation.

Erica - 22yo - level 22 -
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7 months ago

Our relationship is to open to have that worry.

David - 46yo - level 30 -
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7 months ago

Yes, but it will likely require change on the part of both partners to achieve. The root motivations that led to cheating must be addressed; broken trust must be repaired; expectations of yourselves and each other must be reexamined and revised. An impasse on any of these things can doom the rehabilitation of your relationship which, in any case, will never quite be the same as it was. It has to be unequivocally worthwhile for both partners.

Michael - 37yo - level 17 -
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7 months ago

No! Once the trust is broke there is no going back. Cheating is a choice not a mistake

Danyale - 37yo - level 16 -
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7 months ago

No

Amber - 34yo - level 16 -
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7 months ago

Definitely. Infidelity isn't necessarily a sign that your partner is a bad person, and it's not something that can't be fixed. If they are genuinely sorry it means something in the relationship structurally hasn't been working for them, but that they do still love you. That doesn't mean it's your fault, it just means they didn't communicate a need properly. Have a lot of honest and open communication to see what needs to be different and if you can be okay with what they need to change

anonymous - 41yo - level 1 -
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7 months ago

Hard question any kind of situations can exist but in the final no it can’t. Everybody makes decision and that’s a conscious decision. Unless your partner was struck with a rare form of momentanous amnesia he or she knew what he or she was doing. I don’t think the pain of the betrayal can disapear and it will resurface one day or another.

Hicham - 35yo - level 15 -
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7 months ago

No

Paulina - 20yo - level 33 -
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7 months ago

Yes

Nannette - 51yo - level 21 -
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7 months ago

No way. It is the end of the relationship.

Hajnalka - 29yo - level 19 -
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7 months ago

If you truly love them then yes dont mess it up again because theres no going back after that your brain will eat you a live we are going on 6 years of the bs

Erin - 35yo - level 9 -
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7 months ago

Definitely. The research shows us that most (women) cheat to save their relationships and marriages. Look up Dr Alicia Walker and her research.

Ashley - 26yo - level 17 -
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7 months ago

Definitely not.

Arturo - 26yo - level 13 -
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7 months ago

No.

Katie - level 1 -
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7 months ago

I guess it's possible. The big problem will always be trust. And that the thought of what happened will always haunt you. They will jump into your head and take over and that is all you can think about.

Nathen - 36yo - level 34 -
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7 months ago

Google the Ted talk of Esther Perel, a sexuologist: ‘rethinking infidelity, a talk for anyone who has ever loved’

Steve - 33yo - level 39 -
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7 months ago

https://youtu.be/P2AUat93a8Q

Steve - 33yo - level 39 -
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7 months ago

No!

Brad - 36yo - level 41 -
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7 months ago

No! Two years ago I would’ve said yes. But today after believing the best in my partner I learned it became a habit. Ive learned it’s never okay.

Renée - 36yo - level 23 -
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7 months ago

No. This is just my opinion. Once trust is broken, the person who didn’t break their word needs to move on to find someone with the same amount of respect, loyalty, and dedication so to find the perfect match. Cheating isn’t a mistake like spilling milk. Cheating is intentional and allowed to happen. Once a person steps out, that should be the end. If the cheater has a life experience change and stops cheating, maybe the relationship could reconnect later. For me, cheating crosses a line as a deal breaker along with abuse because it is emotional abuse that harms. Infidelity is a character flaw that should be passed on and not given another chance. Cheating is a red glad that something is too broken to fix. I wouldn’t tell a partner with a black eye to work it out anyone than I would tell someone who was cheated on to work it out. I’m answering for me, so I’m sure many disagree. This is just my outlook on a cheater and it’s bye bye because I’m too busy for that pathetic nonsense. Break off the relationship if you want to play instead of lying and betraying.

Heather - 44yo - level 6 -
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7 months ago

Perhaos...but not for me!

Mark - 48yo - level 8 -
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7 months ago

As long as your partner is committed to making things right. I had an ex who was sorry for what he did and he did want to fix it but when I didn't trust him after a couple of months...he kind of just gave up trying.

Diamond - 23yo - level 11 -
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7 months ago

No. Because it will always be there- looming. And you’ll always wonder what they are doing, who they are with. Save yourself the repeat heart ache and move on

Jen - 43yo - level 30 -
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7 months ago

after something like this happens I think that the relationship will be never the same

Nelson - 33yo - level 32 -
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7 months ago

There relationship can never be the same. Not saying you can’t move forward, but the relationship is something new. I think that’s the mistake most people make. They grow frustrated because things don’t go back to normal

Nichole - 35yo - level 41 -
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7 months ago

Figuring out the why, seeing if it can be resolved, and truly forgiving the person, which means never bringing that up again.
The relationship won't function if one partner's unfaithfulness is brought up to be used against them.

Joanna - 24yo - level 10 -
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7 months ago

You can truly forgive but still bring it up. Like any other trauma you never forget it though

Autumn-Skye - 47yo - level 43 -
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7 months ago

There is no way, it is a deal breaker

Charley - 41yo - level 45 -
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7 months ago

Yes but if you go a long time without comeing clean it would be harder

Curtis - 31yo - level 33 -
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7 months ago

It ended my 1st marriage when my ex did it. Even though i was willing to move past it, she wasn't. Exposed other problems. Turned out for the best. I learned never to let anyone in as much as i did and i met a wonderful woman who's now my better half of over 20 years.

Douglas - 55yo - level 32 -
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7 months ago

It would be really painful but I'd forgive her

Dev - 26yo - level 16 -
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7 months ago

Honest and open communication and propably some couples counselling

Taija - 25yo - level 22 -
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7 months ago

No

anonymous - 37yo - level 5 -
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7 months ago

No

Rusty - 40yo - level 15 -
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7 months ago

If your partner is completely honest with you and is committed to being loyal and faithful! Maybe if they are understanding of the trust issues that comes with it!

Charri - 45yo - level 19 -
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7 months ago

Not possible. You can try and work and seek counseling etc but in the end of the day you cant take it back and future together would be over

Matt - 36yo - level 17 -
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7 months ago

It's been done. Everyone has their own limits...

Tiffani - 40yo - level 32 -
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7 months ago

I feel like people do and people have, but it's VERY hard and you'll likely need counselling or couple's therapy to try to rebuild that trust. Even then, you still might not be able to mend the relationship.

Eileen - 34yo - level 45 -
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7 months ago

Yes

Chad - 39yo - level 9 -
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7 months ago

Yes, I believe there is a way.

Ernie - 33yo - level 22 -
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7 months ago

Absolutely not....

Alisha - 36yo - level 11 -
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7 months ago

Honestly, unless something is medically wrong with them (like lack of impulse control), then no. I've been cheated on several times. And while the partner might be genuinely sorry, once a cheater, always a cheater. It destroys trust, too.

Malorie - 27yo - level 11 -
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7 months ago

Call me close minded but I think this is something I can never tolerate. Other problems I'm willing to fix and give chances but never for infedility. Trust has been broken and obviously he or she is not that into you.

Enna - 22yo - level 13 -
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7 months ago

That is too bad, because as Sam says, for it to have happened, there was a trigger. would you not want to know what that was? At the end of the day it’s about tomorrow’s and what you want to do to make it a happier place. Good luck.

Peter - 60yo - level 28 -
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7 months ago

Sometimes the trigger is just their crummy character and poor life skills too

Autumn-Skye - 47yo - level 43 -
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7 months ago

If the show by their actions their sincerity then yes.

David - 47yo - level 31 -
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7 months ago

Absolutely. If they take responsibility and own it and are actually working to fix the relationship then yes it is possible.

Nikki - 27yo - level 42 -
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7 months ago

Yes, it's called moving on. They apologize and you move on.

Steve - 37yo - level 45 -
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7 months ago

Yes if they are truly sorry I say give them another chance you never know it might draw you two closer together but figure out what was the cause of the infidelity and pray keep God in the center

KeShawna - 26yo - level 2 -
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7 months ago

Yes. Super difficult, but with a lot of communication it can be worked on.

Abby - 26yo - level 47 -
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7 months ago

Absolutely no... trust is broken

anonymous - 37yo - level 10 -
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7 months ago

No. They should have talked about it before cheating if they were missing something. Open and honest communication is the only way to a happy relationship. They lied to you and went behind your back instead of looking to work through it together.

Kailey - 22yo - level 43 -
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7 months ago

Yes if the cheater really does love the person they would be willing to do whatever it takes to keep the one they love

Nathan - 29yo - level 1 -
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7 months ago

No. Not for me at least. I will eventually forgive his actions, but surely not in a relationship with him. I know everyone makes mistakes, but how much of a mistake could it be to date or have sex with someone else? It's not like "uups! Just happened" it has enough time after that to think about you and your relationship.

Ximena - 22yo - level 28 -
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7 months ago

I believe so, only if the person is genuine and truthful and really wants to work on the relationship.

Amber - 32yo - level 9 -
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7 months ago

If your partner has changed You it is not forgivable. It hurts. And even if he apologizes and regrets it, he'll say it again. But to avoid treason need a the joint work both.

Anna Kelly - 33yo - level 17 -
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7 months ago

Hell no

Catherine - 33yo - level 21 -
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7 months ago

Yes. if there is open communication and listening

Meranda - 25yo - level 12 -
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7 months ago

I hope and pray yes

Bill - 48yo - level 9 -
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7 months ago

Yes with communication and work

Heather - 36yo - level 32 -
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7 months ago

My personal opinion is No, if they do something that is obviously cheating, it is impossible to trust them again. This may just be me because i have a very hard time trusting someone in the first place

anonymous - 20yo - level 9 -
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7 months ago

No. Once trust is broken it is over

William - 33yo - level 26 -
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7 months ago

I've never been in the situation personally but I choose to believe that if there is genuine remorse and effort, it is possible.

Jared - 33yo - level 19 -
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